How To Be An Amazing Gift-er

New Year ’s Eve is right around the corner! Have you thought about how you are going to “wow” your loved ones when the clock strikes midnight on December 31^st? While nothing quite beats the thrill of seeing your unwrapped present in the hands of your friend (or relative), the decisions that you have to make up to that point can be nerve wracking. You not only have to trust your intuition to decide on the best present but you also want to make sure that you select a gift that will be meaningful (bonus points if you get tears of joy!).

A study published in the Journal of Consumer Research by assistant professor, Mary Steffel (Northeastern University) and associate professor, Robyn A. Le Boeuf (University of Florida) suggests that people’s desire to be seen as “thoughtful” when selecting gifts for multiple relatives might color their decision-making. Steffel and Le Boeuf conducted a total of six experiments and found that people who choose gifts with multiple people on their minds tend to over-individualize their gift selections. Put another way, “gifters” pass up on better-liked gifts in an effort to appeal to their recipients’ unique tastes. For instance, when asked to select DVDs for two hypothetical cousins who live separately, study participants apparently basing their judgment on the recipients’ assumed genre preferences over-individualized even though they knew that both cousins liked animated movies. So, rather than giving both cousins DVDs from the animated movie genre, subjects selected a sci-fi/fantasy movie for the one with a specific preference.

According to the authors of the study, “Gifts that seemed especially thoughtful in isolation appeared much less so when another person would also receive that gift…” Essentially, when we let multiple recipients crowd our mind during the gift selection process, we get hyper vigilant regarding their individual preferences so much that we might end up giving them a below-average gift just to appear more considerate.

So how do you choose the most amazing gift for your friends and family?

Focus on one person at a time

If you have to select gifts for multiple people, focus on just one friend/family member at a time. For instance, if you are shopping for two coffee lovers, do not pass up on a popular blend of coffee (e.g., Colombia) simply because one of them prefers a different origin (e.g., Hawaiian coffee).

Ask yourself “what would they want for themselves?”

We know you want to appear thoughtful but try to let go of your own desires in order to choose a gift that your friend will actually like. Researchers, Steffel and Le Boeuf point out that “…focusing givers’ attention on recipient liking, by prompting them to predict what recipients would choose for themselves, can lead givers to select gifts that are more likely to satisfy their goal of giving the best-liked gifts.”

Sprinkle a little bit of you on the gift

The gift you choose does not have to be all about the recipient! If you want your friend to feel closer to you, choose a gift that is authentically linked to you. In a study by Lara Aknin (Simon Fraser University, Burnaby) and Lauren Human (McGill University, Montréal), over a hundred students were instructed to choose a musical track on iTunes to give a friend, relative or romantic partner. The recipients who received a track that in a way, revealed the giver’s “true self” said that they felt closer to the giver. Christian Jarrett from the British Psychological Society suggests that by choosing a gift that reveals your own interests, you are actually acting courageously.